and then what now...?

A week of nerve wracking interviews and tests. Almost 3-hour long rides just to go the test and sometimes interview venue just to have a spare 15-30 minutes of the interviewer's time. And then, what do I get? Still, I'm not sure.

Graduating, I thought everything will be a little easier than sit through 5-hour long classes and having to face the multitude of examinations that I'm not even sure I'll pass. Now, looking back, I wish I wasn't so eager to get my diploma and go out to the real "world" aka the industry. I'm saying this for the sole reason that I'm not yet equipped with all the things that I need to survive the jungle where all the experienced people turned out to be the winners.

I am not an achiever when I was in college, we didn't even have an OJT and for the record, I'm not an active student during those days. These things, the things that I should have had back then, are what keeps me from finding the job that I would really like to have. I tried to think that all of these aren't really important in having a job during my interviews, but I got a reality check and soon enough I found out that these things really mattered, especially for someone like me whose just fresh from the university with no experience at all. And the only thing that would really get me noticed is my interview, given that I would be invited to one.

This is so hard. Life is so hard and I'm starting to think that the world is so unfair, biased and that sometimes favoritism is so rampant I'm starting to lose my trust in the world that I'm about to face. But then again all of this "thoughts" is just the consequence of all those mind boggling exams and pant-peeing interview questions that I got to experience in those interviews.

As of this moment, I'm still waiting (patiently and nervously) for the results of all those interviews that I had and I hope and I pray that I got the job that I so longed for. Maybe, just this once, I'll have to believe that I am enough for the job. That I too, have the ability to be able to be the person that I dreamed to be.

Hopefully, by the end of this week I get all the answers that I've been searching for. The answers that can make or break the dreams, the aspirations and the goals that I have in life. Just God, please let me have the strength and the courage to accept the things that you'll be giving in my plate may it be good or challenging.